In October 2012 mys husband and I found out we were having a baby. We were in shock and did not expect it to happen so soon. Thoughts ran through my head, wondering if we were ready for a baby. Over the next hew weeks we were less in shock, and I was getting morning sickness. Physically I felt yucky, but emotionally I was nervous and excited. In February I went in for my doctors 18 week appointment. By this time I was not feeling as nervous about having a baby and I was excited about the journey ahead. At my appointment my doctor asked me if I wanted to do the 2nd trimester testing. This tests if your baby has a risk for having of down syndrome or a neural tube defect such as spina bifida. Being a first time mom I thought this test was routine and something that every pregnant woman does so I didn't think twice about it. A week later I missed a call from my doctors office, they left a message saying to call them back, they wanted to go over my test. My heart starting beating out of my chest, I was nervous about what they were going to tell me. I finally convinced myself that everything was going to be okay and gave them a call back. The nurse proceeded to tell me that my tests came back that my baby has a high chance of having down syndrome. The nurse told me my baby had a 1 in 2 chance of having down syndrome. She told me we needed to schedule an appointment with Maternal Fetal Medicine at IMED to have an in depth ultrasound to look for physical signs of down syndrome. On my way home I was in complete shock, I felt like a zombie. I just kept thinking this can't be happening to me. I went to my mom's house and when I walked in I lost it. There was uncontrollable sobbing and my heart was broken. I felt like I was in a dream, how could this be happening to me? Would I be able to raise a child with Down syndrome, this must be a mistake It was extremely hard to tell Adam, I felt like it was my fault. He reassured me it wasn't, but he was also in shock. That night when he came home from work I could see the worry and ditress on his face. My dad gave both of us a comfort blessing and tears filled Adam's eyes which broke my heart. Over the next few days our family's prayed that everything would be okay and the baby would not have down syndrome, and would be healthy.
The day of the ultrasound I was a nervous wreck. I kept telling myself things would be okay and our baby would be healthy. But deep down I new something was not right. But maybe it was because I was nervous. My sister and dad came with us for support. During the ultrasound the tech took a lot of pictures but did not say a word which made us even more nervous. When I asked her if everything was okay, she told me she would let the doctor talk to us. I knew this was not a good sign. The doctor came in with a genetic counselor and and proceeded to tell us that there many physical markers that showed our baby had down syndrome. My body went numb, how could this be? To be 100% sure we did an amniocentesis that would confirm the diagnosis. Also while telling us our baby has down syndrom they told us it was a little boy. I do remember when they did the amnio I saw them stick the needle in my belly and Joseph touched it with his foot, then quickly moved it away. Such a little stinker like his dad is what I thought. I wish I had that video because I would give anything to see him move again. But at the time i didn't know it would be one of the last times we would see our little boy move. The next few days were hard for me and Adam. We talked about how it would be to have a child with down syndrome and how we were going to get through it. A week passed and I new any day we would be getting the results back from the amnio. I kept telling preparing myself to hear the words, that your baby does have down syndrome. I finally got the call from the doctor,, she told me that our baby did not have down syndrome. I was shocked and over joyed! It was a miracle.
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